'Little Red App' gives you pocket Xi Jinping

Everyone's required to download...or else.

    2019/02/18

NSFW    BEIJING — Xi Jinping's new social propaganda app has become hugely popular on the App Store in China over the past few days, thanks to a little strong-arming by the Communist Party.

According to the BBC, the app is called Xue Xi Qiang Guo, or Study the Great Nation, with Xue Xi also a pun meaning to study President Xi.

The government wasted no time in launching the app on the first day of the lunar year, no doubt so Communist Party members, civil servants, state-owned company employees, and public school teachers can get their fill of propaganda. You know, since they've been required to.

According to the New York Times, lucky users can catch up on the latest state media reports and brush up on 'Xi Jinping Thought.' They can also treat themselves to a quote of the day from Winnie the Pooh's doppelganger, weekly quizzes, and a television show called 'Xi Time.' How exciting.

The Little Red App is also equipped with Snapchat-style messaging, video chat, and calendar functions — all the better for the government to keep an eye on its peoples with.

Like with everything in China, doing each activity earns users points that can be redeemed for prizes later on.

Though some backside-smooching institutions and employers are apparently requiring their employees to earn a certain number of points each day. Otherwise, dishonor on you, dishonor on your cow, dishonor on your whole family!

Needless to say, the ratings on the app say it all — a measly 2.7 out of five.
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